Through my window

She has a fair complexion, smooth skin & luscious long black hair. One strand of it touching her face gently, it is usually tied into a scruffy, untidy pony which is absolutely un-hateable.

She's kind of a mystery for me. She never leaves the house, never hangs out with friends & i only see her three times a day that's it !

Everytime i look at her, from a hundred miles an hour to asleep in a nanosecond. I wanted so badly to lie down next to her on the couch, to wrap my arms around her & sleep. Not fuck, like in those movies. Not even have sex. Just sleep together, in the most innocent sense of the phrase.

But I lack the courage & she might have a boyfriend & i am gawky & she is gorgeous & i am hopelessly boring & she is endlessly fascinating.

So i walked back to my bed & collapsed on the bottom bunk , thinking that if people were rain , i was drizzle & she was hurricane

Written by- Avi

To be an artist

To be an artist,

Is to inhale grief 

And exhale poetry. 

Each stroke is a verse 

And each painting is a poem.

I here write an ode to my art. 

I begin,but stop halfway,

I mess up, I leave you behind,

I destroy,

I rush. 

But you never stop flowing, through my soul,through my hands,through my words.

I create. 

Like a little child,I awe with muse

I dance in the rain 

I run in the sun. 

My heart have no room for sorrow anymore;

I sing to the waves 

I laugh with the stars 

My heart have no room for sorrow anymore; 

I have all and everything to paint 

I have all and everything to write 

I wonder,will my lifetime be enough? 

Poet~ Maya

The anatomy of Regrets 

Let's talk about regret.

About everything that's left unsaid and incomplete

And everything that's is said and complete 

I suppose regret weigh you down 

When you face a situation you tend to exist in parallel universes.

Your thoughts are shattered into a million galaxies and each having their own universes where you might have said or done something you didn't get to say or do back then. 

These universes exist inside your head making it hard to move on.And then all you ask yourself will "what if?" 

And in the end your life is going to be a series of what ifs. 

What if I never confessed?

What if I remained silent?

What if I screamed? 

What if I ran?

What if I stay still? 

Well,every universe is made of stars and stardust and everything science.

There is always something beautiful to stare at.

Maybe all your choices are like that.

Maybe there is something beautiful waiting for you in them.

All your regrets may have a beautiful ending.

Someday.

Oneday.

Flowers and love  

Poet ~ Maya

The Island of Missing Trees by Elif Shafak

 Review | Summary

Another magically beautiful book that hits me the second time this year.

After reading this book plethora of emotions churning inside me, I can define myself now, probably I am a hermit and this book smells sad. The metaphors used to describe mundane life with so much intensity goes far down in your heart and enough to make you dumbfounded with a wordless pain.

A saga that follows from 1974 to 2010s, a gripping interwoven plot, it’s a lovely historical story that never ever felt like history rather like the love story of Defne and Costas and yet so thought-provoking and affirmative to prove everything on earth, every life is beautiful at the same time enough to clog your throat with a helpless sadness.

Defne and Costas, met in High school, fell in love, they parted and again fate make them come close; they met in search of lost people who were missing from the civil war.

“a butterfly skeleton is not inside its body they don’t have a hard Framework protected beneath soft tissues the way we do in fact their entire skin is an invisible skeleton one might say

I mean imagine Cypress as a huge butterfly then why you didn’t have to dig the ground for our missing we would know we are covered with them.”

This book is told with an immense depth of feeling, insightful, humorous, and somehow possesses hidden faith towards readers! There are lots of twists and turns unfurled in a truly surprising way. As the story unfolds you will get to know a bundle of information about many other trees gingerly. I was arrested by this narration style, how could someone think such a way of storytelling style!

This book is a compelling historical fiction uttered by a fig tree. Yes, the whole story was narrated from a tree’s perspective. A fig tree was brought from Cypress Island to England.

It also tells us the sufferings of being alive. This book is basically, loosely based on real-life incidents that happened on Cypress Island and the author blended all the small little incidents so gradually and gently. Lots of incidents that happened with Costas and Defne’s family have actually happened in those days.

Heartwarming yet so heart-wrenching story, its’ eloquence is enchanting and romancing with the natural world in a way that was unexpected for me. Read it and let yourself fall in love with this planet and its nature.

Review by : Mili Das (Click to know more about her)

Inner Trek by Mohan Rao: Book Review

It started nonchalantly and ended up with a consciousness that is impeccably soothing to the heart. I always thought that traveling in nature, being amused by amazing natural beauty, are such feelings that we never achieved in the material world, that feeling is priceless. Standing in front of a huge peak of a mountain or abiding at the foot of a tall large tree, gives us goosebumps, such vibes that remind us how small we are and also how lucky we are that we are viewing nature’s Lager than life creativity. We are lucky to experience something so astonishing, this experience is priceless. That existence is invaluable.

I came across a beautiful book that is compelling and rising inside as the book goes. I want to share my thoughts.

Mohan Ranga Rao sheds his journey in this book. He engraved here his journey to Kailash which is situated in Tibet. Very interestingly he wrote about everything that happened on the way. Therefore lots of things happened during the journey which makes every journey, not just travel but an experience for a lifetime.

It took me no time to hook up with this book because of the obvious attraction of traveling through pages. He described the struggle, he described the roughness of the paths, he encrypted the warmth of fellow travelers. Those little stories are like jeweled in this book. Not only it was greatly narrated the details of traveling but the author did research work for every temple and shrines that came in this way. This book explores all the hardships that a traveler needs to face in this way and makes you prepared for the journey. He also added such beautiful photos that made this book so much enthralling to me.

I enjoyed this book and the journey of the author because of his crispy writing style. Author started this book with his own life-threatening experience and how it moved him to this journey. Author Mohan conveyed his experience and feeling very expertly, it never felt dull because of his lucid and quirky writing style and sharp edge editing. Kudos to the editor.

From the beginning to the end, every detail is very helpful if you’re planning to go to Kailash. Very well-documented journey. This journey never started as a pilgrim but it became an exploration of consciousness, not in a spiritual but philosophical way. Such a journey can teach us a lot of things about ourselves and about life. I will recommend it to everyone, do give it a try.

Book Review by : Mili Das (click to know more about her)

I read this book as my book club’s BOOK OF THE MONTH, thanks for choosing this book because I wanted to read it. It was shortlisted for the Booker prize 2020. I was buddy reading with a special friend of mine.I am thankful to you guys, without you I won’t be able to read this difficult book, talking and discussing with you made this reading easier.

This book started with a simple mother-daughter relationship where the mother is suffering from Alzheimer’s. Antara started taking care of her mother, she took her mother to her home. while living together a doubt grows inside her, ”is it true mother really forgetting old stuff”; but she never forgets to insult her in front of everyone. Antara couldn’t find a moment when her mother didn’t try to defame her or discredited her for her drawings, even she burned all Antara’s drawings and tell her never to make any drawings or paintings. Antara absorbed all in silence and tried to remember her childhood, her mother doing all that she did from the beginning then what is actually she forgets? She didn’t forget to insult her! Antara started recalling her memory.

It’s written with emotional aspects from a daughter’s point of view, Antara’s point of view, and slowly I started getting experience the true view of the whole plot. This story actually evolved around a narcissistic mother and daughter’s relationship.

I understand this is a story of a traumatized girl who’s now apparently getting the responsibility of her sick mother who seems to suffer memory loss due to Alzheimer’s.

The author here facilitates the view of a girl whose childhood was not loved by her mother nor embraced by her father. She had to face a difficult, neglected childhood. There are two parallel stories embedded like cobwebs, one is Antara’s childhood memories and the other one is today’s situation.

Her mother shows very clear signs of a narcissistic mentality. I was awestruck by Avni Doshi’s bare, blatant prose. Every line of this book sounds emotionless, raw, bare, and has an earthy tone making reading unapologetically rigid. Sometimes its even gross. This narrative is not suitable for many, it will stripe your soul with an easy-going style, it hurts you. You need time to get the reflection of every single word.

It feels horrible when I find Antara inherits the same narcissistic traits from her mother. It’s commendable that the author facilitates the view from a traumatized, neglected child of a narcissist mother but it also nurtures a proverb- like mother like daughter- it’s really harmful to society. Then the survivors would always be mistrusted, scrutinized, and never get a chance to go back to normal life. Not all victims adopted their narc parent’s traits! This book gives great insights into a traumatized mind.

Author Avni Doshi has done a commendable job in giving voice to the perturbing mind. This book is a boon, and also a curse for society. This book is very insightful to know a traumatized brain, their perspective, but at the same time it failed to give us a proper storyline, it felt like she tried to put her knowledge, in the pictorial narrative she served it in a cloak of a story.

Review by : Mili Das (Click to know more about her)